Hermit Thrush Horny Level: 7
weedguy420boner: Thrush is at 7
weedguy420boner: *brews another pot of coffee*
me: get the boys upstairs on the horn. we are at 7
me: a bunch of big supercomputers installed in the 70s are whirring to life for the first time trying to analyze the horny level
weedguy420boner: The facility’s pneumatic tubes are looking like the club as the scientists try to make sense of the data
me: fluorescent lights down a hallway blink to life in succession, lighting the path to an abandoned laboratory in which unauthorized experiments were carried out on horny levels. the walls are filled with photos of thrush as a child undergoing a gauntlet of testing, mainly on his dick and balls
me: complex calculations fill a chalkboard at the back of the room. at the end of the equation… the answer appears to be… F to the power of “e”, f to the power of “o”… Fefo?????
weedguy420boner: An old man, long since retired, receives a phone call in he dead of night. He picks up, a voice says “7” and hangs up. He rises from bed to stare out into the night.
me: residents in a remote, sparsely populated town reported a strange emergency broadcast system message taking over every channel on tv. the message itself was garbled in a way no one could understand, as if the tape it was recorded on had degraded over time. this town also was the site of advanced weaponry research during the cold war
weedguy420boner: I think he’s just jacking off in earnest now
me: yeah he’s slammin that thing all over